Hello all,
Typically Candace will write her part and then Chris will write his. This time though, we decided to write this post together. Here were the flaming sticks that we juggled: do we say, “To hell with this IVF thing” and plunge into adoption or do we try for one last go at having our own child with a final, no holds barred FET (frozen embryo transfer for those not hip to the lingo). Strangely, on the same day we had our W.T.F. (What The Fuck went wrong with the IVF) appointment, we went to an information session with Bethany Christian Adoption Agency. Talk about being overwhelmed and further torn! We talked about this for a few days. Really, it is nearly an impossible decision to make. The questions we had were something like:
1. Do we go with something we know (IVF)?
2. Do we go with the hopefully sure thing of adoption?
3. Can we go through the adoption process with embryos on ice?
4. Can we fund raise enough money for adoption?
5. If another IVF procedure fails (i.e., more money spent) how much further back would that put us financially for adoption?
6. If we find oil in our backyard, could/should we use a surrogate for our frozen embies?
7. Can we mentally handle anything else … period?
After much discussion, a few glasses of wine/beer, tears, tissues, and talking with friends and strangers that have gone through all of these things, we decided … drum roll … pause for dramatic effect … We are going with another IVF round! Shocker right? That being said, we are not going to repeat the last procedure. We have to tweak something! There is no way we can have put forth all the effort we did last time, been handed a BFN, and be like, “Well, let’s try that again.” So, we are doing our research. One thing we uncovered, INTRALIPIDS. We are not sure about adding this to our FET cycle procedures, but it is definitely on the table. More to come …
C & C
That is what this journey is all about… going with your heart and doing what you both feel is the route for you. Best of luck to you!
Chris and Candice,
I stumbled across your blog via the @larc article that was posted this week. I too work at NASA LaRC and so does my husband. Your story sounded so much like our own. We struggled for 4 years with infertility before we made the decision to adopt in 2004. Following 4 failed IUI cycles, our decision was to either pursue IVF or adoption. Our choice was adoption and after a little over a year we became the proud parents of a blessed angel from Wuwei, China. She was 10 months old when we brought her home in December of 2005 and is now a very bright, engergetic 7-year old. We used Bethany Christian Services for our adoption and had a great experience. I pray that your infertility journey ends soon and that God will give you the strength to deal with bumps and bruises (literally) along the way. I never thought I’d be a mom but the day they put that precious baby girl in my arms for the first time was soooo worth the wait. Best of luck to you and thanks for allowing us to follow your journey.
Sincerely,
Tracee Rice
Tracee,
Thank you very much for sharing your story with us. Although all of our stories have hardship and joy, it is comforting to know that there are others that have followed similar paths or are on the journey along with us. Finding happiness in your daughter is encouraging and gives us hope that we will ultimately reach our goal of starting a family. Thank you for checking out our blog and check back to see how our story progresses!