After our previously failed IVF round, we both had a sneaking suspicion that during our WTF appointment with our RE we would probably be asked if we were game for another hysteroscopy. Really I think since I have such an epic uterus they can’t stop wanting to look at it, ever stare at the sun? I kid I kid. What is a hysteroscopy you ask? Well well allow me to tell you…
If we just look at the word, we can get a very good idea of what is going on here. Hystero and Scopy are two different words combined to represent this awesome medical procedure. Hystero comes from the Greek word “hystera” which means uterus or womb. The second half, scopy, comes from the Greek word “scopos” meaning to watch or see. So, let’s put them together. If we are performing a hysteroscopy, we are going to watch or see a uterus. A fairly angry and mysterious uterus in my case. If we fast-forward to modern times, goodbye ancient Greeks, we would find that a hysteroscope is involved. This instrument has an armament of tools, the most important of which is the light. That is what lets the Drs see all of the polyps and other foreign joys found there. During a hysteroscopy, the Drs will insert the hysteroscope past your cervix and into your uterus to look for anything that would implicate difficulties in conceiving. Then, in a Chuck Norris fashion, they remove these malevolent entities and leave your uterus squeaky clean for the next, hopefully successful, round of IVF, IUI, or whatever conception method you are working with.
This one would make hysteroscopy #4 for me. What hits it home is the wonderful lady from our clinic that schedules the surgeries who we adore, told the pre-surgery doctors during our pre-op appointment that there is no need in us getting winded and in great dramatic detail with Candace about this one, she can probably do this procedure on herself by now. YEP. Honestly though, I was totally ok with doing this again. Aside from it being a wicked expensive and semi painful nap at Spa-Hospital, I knew they would be doing another endometrial biopsy. Once you have been told you have pre-cancerous cells that will likely return, an extra eye on things is A-OK with me. Not to mention the in-house biopsy at my OBGYN oncologist was much like a scene out of a horror movie. Needless to say I’d prefer to be under the influence of the hard stuff (anesthesia) when it comes to the biopsies.
We woke up the day of the hysteroscopy like it was old hat. Bag packed, pillow and blanket in the car, empty stomach, check and check. All that was left on the to-do list was I had to take a medication that you are instructed to take that morning which is a cervix softener. It is taken well, not necessarily in the mouth, think more South. Chris and I were so incredibly entertained by the instructions on the bottle: “Take 2 pills per vagina”. Damn good thing there were only 2 pills in that bottle or that may have explained my infertility issue- Missing vagina?? It also comes with a warning of cramping and nausea, but no worries here because I have taken this stuff tons of times and no problemo. Yeah so … not this time. While stuck in traffic on the way to the hospital, low and behold trouble starts a-brewing. I have learned over the years of fertility trials/college days ALWAYS keep a plastic bag in the car. Chris was like the Flash and had it for me at record speed. Just a tip for everyone, run out and stock your car with “emergency” bags. Don’t! I repeat, do not get the scented ones! Just trust me on this folks.
We check in, I get my IV, see a flock of Dr’s and nurses and the like, bodda bing bodda boom… however much time lapsed in between … and my hysteroscopy is done. A little crampy, a little bleedy but nothing mega boat size maxi’s and a heating pad can’t cure. Dr. O (the man, the myth, the legend) removed some bonus lesions and my pathology report came back clear! {insert Psy’s Gangnam Style dance}.
